That sound you hear is the collective panting of Janet Jackson stans, myself included, freaking the eff out: this morning, Miss Jackson announced that not only will she be releasing a brand-new album, she’s also embarking upon a world tour, starting in Vancouver, BC, as early as August 31. August 31!

The tour, which was announced on her website, already has 30 dates scheduled, and kicks off with a few dates in Southwestern Canada before heading to the Southeast of the US, the West Coast, and circling back to the Midwest and to Hawaii through early November. The full schedule can be viewed here, with pre-sale tickets becoming available as early as June 22. (Clearly it’s been in the works for awhile—Jackson also posted a video excerpt of dancers auditioning for the tour.) That sound you hear is that of raw human flesh being torn apart and fingerprints being gradually erased from frantic clicking as Janet Jackson stans, myself included, attempt to get a freaking ticket.

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One way to expedite your chances is to cop merch—a package deal of a t-shirt and album pre-order comes with an elusive pre-sale ticket access code which may or may not get you in the queue today? Unclear, really, but no one curr, people will do that and virtually anything to get to this tour. (It is 9:12 AM EST and I have already thirstily texted several friends, family, and editors in a rabid-dog attempt to get in on that ticket game.)

Appropriately, Jackson also announced that her first single from her new album is called “No Sleeep” (yes, copy-editors, that’s three Es, but the hashtag is #NoSl333p), which Jimmy Jam is working on (YEEEEE!). The single artwork depicts a font made of EQ levels.

Also, not coincidentally, today is the 20th Anniversary of the “Scream” video. Iconic!


Contact the author at julianne@jezebel.com.

Image via JanetJackson.com