Weekly-ish, a pre-approved, snap-judged music guide based on our very scientific, non-subjective Yes/No rating system. There's really no debating this, come on, stop.

Y: In her video for "Little Red Wagon," Miranda Lambert struts around wearing red sparkly cowboy boots and bedazzled hoop earrings and ogles a topless pool guy; she's equipped only with zero fucks and a dream. [Rolling Stone]

Advertisement

Y: For most of this "Doubt" video, Mary J. Blige is snapping on stage in an empty auditorium because nobody but her matters. It's what me singing this song in my head looks like. [Miss Info]

N: Had I been anywhere near this recording of "Pretty Young Thing," I would've pulled these guys aside and said, "Can you not." I wasn't, though. So this happened. And now we have a version of "PYT" featuring DJ Mustard's predictable synth chops and Jamie Foxx's strained vocals. [That Grape Juice]

Y: Jason Derulo's crush tune "Want to Want Me" features one of those speeding-on-the-highway rhythms. The song itself is sweet and summery and I can't deny it. [Idolator]

Advertisement

Y: A slow builder with a patient pace, Mumford and Sons' "Believe" will probably send lots of spin classes into frenzy. [Billboard]

Y: Diplo's "Hey QT" remix is slightly less effervescent than the original, with a feel-good bass and mickey-moused vocals. I can imagine being rapt on a dance floor. [Pitchfork]

N: The sentiment of Brandy Zdan's "More of a Man" ("I'm not waiting on you to come around / But when you do you better be more of a man than me") appeals to me more than the song itself, which gives me karaoke vibes. [Spin]

N: I was rocking with Snoop Dogg's "Peaches N Cream" for like five seconds and then it started annoying me. He's going for funky disco skate rap but eh... [Billboard]

Advertisement

Y: Orange remixed Kiesza's "Sound of a Woman," upping the BPM to give it more of a synth symphony edge. [Idolator]

Y: "Ambitionz of a Ridah" sounds like Game and Def Loaf are rapping in a swag vacuum and I'm down for it. Game: "Hit you with the helicopter tongue/ Then fuck you till the helicopter come." [Miss Info]

Y: Bobby Brackins shot the bright, fun video for "My Jam" in Puerto Rico with Zendaya and Jeremih. Nothing out of the ordinary, except that it def makes you want to book that Living Social getaway asap. [Idolator]


Contact the author at clover@jezebel.com.