Urban Outfitters Has a Very Tiny Shirt (?) For You

Image via Urban Outfitters/Cosmopolitan
Image via Urban Outfitters/Cosmopolitan

Urban Outfitters, you scamp. What have you done now? The above garment has been described variously as an “ultra-cropped wife beater” and “a white tank top that’s cropped so short, it doesn’t cover anything besides the model’s bra straps.” I often rock this look when I can’t get a turtleneck over my head, which I assume was the inspiration for this item.

The half-shirt was on offer from UO’s “exclusive brand,” Out From Under, though it has since vanished from the website, for some reason. According to Allure, its official name was (is?) the “Out From Under Extreme Crop Tank Top Shrug.” EXTREME CROP TANK TOP. This feels right.

Where does a person wear this? With a bra it just looks stupid, like the model started to put it on but got distracted by Snapchat before she could pull it down all the way. The description calls it “the ultra-sexy way to layer,” emphasizing that it’s “cropped above chest for the coolest layered look featuring a crop neck and thin shoulder straps.” I get, UO, you want it layered. But you’re not my real mom, and frankly I think it would be best worn alone. I could see this fitting in at a grunge-themed sex dungeon, or a nude beach on the Amalfi Coast.


At $16, it’s a bargain. See you in the dungeon.

Night blogger at Jezebel

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I am an old person, and this is a “dickey.” My schoolteacher aunt had them in all colors because she always wore jackets to work, and would not show an inch of chest skin, but frequently had hot flashes so she could not wear a full shirt.

Congratulations, kids. Wear your vintage dickey with nostalgia and pride. I’ll be over here giggling with my sister because dickey was the funniest word ever, made even funnier when our aunt was embarrassed and exasperated by our giggling. D-i-c-k-e-y!