AD: The Bible Continues: Jesus Is Back… With a Sexy Makeover!!!!

This week on AD: The Bible Continues, the Bible continues continuing, and the resurrected Jesus looks fresh and fly and exfoliated, like he just returned from the spa. The celestial spa, that is!

As a reminder, here’s how he was looking last week:

But after three days, he arose with a heavenly makeover!

He is looking holy and also rocking a stylish arm-baring ensemble, VERY fashion-forward. Only problem is he just will not shut up about his Mediterranean diet:

He disappears, then reappears in Galilee, telling Peter how to fish. (Son of God, backseat driver.) His hair looks seriously fantastic:

Glad they’re keeping with the longstanding tradition of sexy Jesus.

Having given the apostles his instructions (go forth and witness), he hitches a ride back to Heaven with a whole chorus of angels. Picture some Vatican ceiling but more Michael Bay:

I’d like to take a moment to award a gold star to High Priest Caiaphas for this week’s best VERY OBVIOUS line: “When will this business end? Why couldn’t this Jesus just… stay dead?” But let’s give a shout out to Pontius Pilate who made a pretty good showing with, “We are Rome. It’s time we shut this story down.”

Poor Pilate, by the way, spent the entire episode trying to leave on vacation with his wife. He continues to fucking hate his job. No one has ever hated his job as much as Pontius Pilate.