Athletes were forced to dress up and entertainers were like, “We do this everyday...” at Wednesday night’s ESPYs, which celebrated humans with exceptional athletic talent. The Wilsons showed off their sex glow as stars mingled with sports Whos in the second biggest awards night in sports next to the Deadspin Awards. More celebs and muscled people below.

Judging from their expressions, footballer Eric Decker and singer Jessie James were feeling moderate levels of discomfort on the carpet. The shoes would have given his outfit a little pop if they weren’t so washed out, and Jessie’s wide leg could’ve been cool at a longer length, but nice color for her. Dwyane Wade (or rather, Dawane Wade) and Gabrielle Union (in sexy cut-out) always look like they just reenacted “Partition” in the limo, while the strangely velvet-clad Steph Curry and Ayesha Curry seem like they’re waiting to put the kiddies to sleep before they can safely cuddle.

Not sure about this prom-y criss-cross neckline on soccer player Christen Press. The unfortunately opinionated Lolo Jones actually looks great in this slate colored slit dress, and I love Teyonah Parris’ jazzy jewel-toned gown and matching head scarf.

Fitness experts Denise Austin and Katie Austin are so happy to be here.

Again, Russell Wilson and Ciara are the belles of the sport ball, especially her in this blush gown that shows cleave, though the dress starts to get confusing around the middle. Extra goal for the giant ring.

The WWE’s Nikki Bella, on trend with the choker, is rocking latex and a fresh tan, and John Cena added just enough flare (bowtie, pin, pocket square) to make his tux not boring. Kobe and Vanessa Bryant are expectedly great and seasoned as a couple. I’d hit an after-party with both of these pairs.

These guys—Michael Thomas (nice bowtie), Odell Beckham (decidedly different as usual), Chris Harris Jr. and Andrew Hawkins—all play professional football and have a delightfully fresh sense of style. Go team.

A good night for pants. Pro skiier Lindsey Vonn’s outfit has a weird superhero feel but whatever, she’s confident. Skylar Diggins’s sheer pants slash draped cover-up is a bit busy for my taste. Also not loving the stripes on Cheryl Burke’s jumper. I hope Kevin Durant’s mom Wanda Durant twirled in her cute sherbert half-pant get-up.

I’m choosing to forgive Lisa Leslie for the juniors department gown because she’s so great. There’s something chic and old-fashioned about snowboarder Chloe Kim’s red lace piece, and soccer player Sydney Leroux picked the perfect silhouette for her bump.

Trai Turner (NFL) and DeAndre Jordan (NBA) went for unconventional suit colors and I appreciate them dearly for it. DeWayne Dedmon (NBA) has one too many buttons?

Alexander Rossi has the demeanor of a guy who drives a race car professionally. Lakers guard Jordan Clarkson is leaning with purpose, as he should because he’s young and dapper (guard me, daddy). Shane West just sucked in a lot of air, and J.R. Smith has the right to look like a Vegas casino dealer ’cause he’s an NBA champ.

Andra Day, Olivia Munn and snowboarder Jamie Anderson’s dresses all have interesting shimmery elements. Paralympian athlete Tatyana McFadden went for a cool, simple sports-bra look that’s a bit athleisure.

Get outta here dad. Actor Jessie T. Usher is giving us smooth Motown backup singer vibes, but the piping on Kyrie Irving’s suit loses me.

Gina Rodriguez is stunning, and wrestler Summer Rae’s jigsaw dress somehow looks fitting on her. Although Danica Patrick’s messenger-bag strap didn’t need to be there, this is an otherwise fine LBD.

Richard Sherman’s blazer pops nicely, albeit in a game show host way, and I only know that last guy Marcedes Lewis because he’s dating a cast member on WAGS.

LeBron, you look good, babe.

Volleyball player April Ross wore a casual Going Out ’fit, ESPN/ABC host Sage Steele has both a perfect name and abs, again Nikki Bella is Nikki Bella, and WNBA player Breanna Stewart is in a decent job interview outfit.

Images via Getty

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