Beauty Tips From Someone With a 'Horse Hoof' Growing Out of Her Head, on Dr. Pimple Popper

Queen of Pop?!? Madonna stans are going to be furious when they see this chyron that bestows Dr. Pimple Popper the title.

Many amazing things happened on this week’s Dr. Pimple Popper, almost all of them concerning Rhonda, a 53-year-old from Orlando, Florida, who had “probably 10 or more” bumps on her head. She showed the world how she styled her hair so as to obscure the bumps. (Somewhat unfortunately, it did not involve a Bumpit or using bumps as her own organic Bumpits.)

Additionally, there was a coming out scene in which Rhonda told her daughter that she had more bumps than she previously let on. I love a good non-queer coming out on TLC.

She had a very special bump in the middle of her forehead that was referred to alternately as “horny,” a toenail, and a horse’s hoof during her segment.

So we meet again.

It did not want to leave Rhonda’s head and Dr. PP had to bring some elbow grease to the hoofectomy (not an actual medical term). The horn, it was bullish.

Ultimately, Dr. Pimple Popper was successful (when isn’t she?), and a biopsy showed no cancer in any of Rhonda’s cysts or horny growth/head toenail/hoof. Now, Rhonda can go swimming and forgo the combovers.

There were no food analogies on this week’s episode, unless you count horse hooves, which some say is found in gelatin, though this assertion is more controversial than you might have understood when you opened this rundown of a Dr. Pimple Popper episode. I had no idea that maybe gelatin isn’t horse hooves. All these years, I thought I was enjoying hooves!

In the place of Dr. Lee’s trademark analogies, please enjoy this gif of a plopping lipoma that was removed from 37-year-old Kevin’s hip. He thought the initial bump was an ant bite, and I was half-curious and half-terrified of finding out why that was his go-to insect that he assumed was biting him. (We never found out why he thought an ant bit him or what previous experience he had with ant bites that left him assuming he’d suffered another, sadly and happily.)

The lipoma weighed 2 lb. and 6 oz. That’s like a half a chicken breast. Just saying. (Someone had to!)