Dr. Pimple Popper Takes Us to Church

There’s nothing more important on this week’s episode of Dr. Pimple Popper than 50-year-old Leta singing the gospel standard “His Eye Is on the Sparrow” to her lipoma. I’m going to let that sentence sink in. It’s an actual sentence that describes an actual thing that happened that an actual TV show captured. Wow. This show is regularly glorious in unexpected ways, and somehow the most unexpected way turns out to be straightforward glory. Neat trick:

His eye is on the sparrow, and I know the sparrow is tuned to TLC.

The position of Leta’s left-leg lump (just under Leta’s butt) was described by Dr. PP like this: “Her booty starts too early.” That’s tough, but I don’t even want to know what starting too late would look like. Leta took to taping down her lump with medical tape and further smoothing that out with Spanx. Dr. Pimple Popper said that it was dimpling due to bands of tissue; given Leta’s embarrassment, it’s safe to say that this is a case in which bands did not make her dance. The lipoma was removed, though, and everything was fine.


Another thing you simply must see is Dr. Lee playing with the lump that was finally removed from Gerald, first featured on last week’s episode.

She’s like a kid in a candy store that was selling portobello mushrooms and strawberry jam. Dr. Lee had to call in backup as Gerald’s middle-finger knot was beyond her purview as a dermatologist. She had orthopedic hand surgeon Dr. James Lilley do the work of separating Gerald from his “pretty vascular tumor.” Artery drama ensued. Also, incredibly, this is what Gerald’s finger looked like when it was finally off:


It looks like a cartoon character ran through his lump and left a ragged outline. Anyway, everything worked so no more rude looks from children as Gerald does his hands-centric job as a crossing guard.

Finally, there was the darling 14-year-old Vinnie from Carbondale, PA, who had a rather large birthmark on his neck.


Do you see where this is going? Into the realm of bullying perhaps?


You are so smart.

Vinnie’s removal was most notable for being hilariously underwhelming. He wanted his birthmark removed to the chagrin of his mother, Jessica, who thought it helped make him unique. It also was reminiscent of his father’s tattoos (this is just straight reporting from Vinnie’s mouth), and his father died of cancer in 2012. This was actually a really confusing and emotional storyline! Anyway, Dr. PP would only snip off three bumps of Vinnie’s birthmark, much to his chagrin.

“Eh,” was his reaction to Dr. PP’s work. “Eh”!!! I love it. Kids will really tell you everything you never wanted to know about yourself and your worth. Eh!


There are a bunch of food analogies in the clip above of Dr. Lee playing with Gerald’s amputated lump—the aforementioned portobello mushroom and strawberry jam—and Dr. Lilley even commented on Dr. Lee’s vast menu of comparisons. Glad I’m not alone in my observation. I kept them in this episode’s reel just for posterity—also featured are glass noodles (???) and Leta comparing her lipoma to an orange. Enjoy:

Now, take us home, Leta!


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Rich Juzwiak

Some Pig. Terrific. Radiant. Humble.