What you see before you die.
Screenshot: Netflix

I’m still not sure who the target demographic is for the Netflix-helmed reboot of Full House is, but I guess they’re getting what they want, because the fourth (?) season of this nostalgia nightmare is coming for all of us very soon.

Because I like to dwell in the present and not in the past, I have not watched a single episode of Fuller House. After viewing the trailer for the show’s fourth season, I still do not think I will start.

Lotta stuff happening in this trailer! Looks like Kimmy Gibler is somehow carrying Stephanie’s baby? Steve, the guy in the varsity jacket that loved D.J., is back to love D.J. some more as an adult—there is also a La La Land-inspired dance sequence that I’d really rather not think about. Stephanie is dressed as some sort of harvest goddess and people throw vegetables at her. Wake Up, San Francisco is back on the air. John Stamos is still hot. Aunt Becky hasn’t aged a day. At one point, Kimmy Gibler flosses.

Intrigued? Repulsed? Alarmed? Deal with your various conflicting emotions on December 14, when this premieres on Netflix.