Here Is John Stamos As a Murderous French Crab Chef

Illustration for article titled Here Is John Stamos As a Murderous French Crab Chef
Screenshot: ABC

When we were little, my sister liked The Little Mermaid’s Chef Louis, the mustachioed French sea cook who tried unsuccessfully to boil Sebastian the crab alive. I always thought that was deeply weird, having not yet learned that everyone has their thing. But now I have seen John Stamos as Chef Louis, and I... get it? I think?

Advertisement

On Sunday, ABC dropped the teaser for The Little Mermaid Live! (not to be confused with the live Little Mermaid remake, because 1990s Disney is a never-ending cash cow), featuring Stamos as Sebastian’s tormenter. He’s got the stache, the red scarf, the thick brows, the oversized hat, and the staggering confidence of a man who does not yet know he’s about to be bested by an anthropomorphic crustacean.

It’s kind of working:

If you’ve forgotten about the original Louis, here he is, teaching small children how to debone a fish (and how to do it in French!):

I look forward to watching Stamos chase Shaggy (who plays Sebastian) around with a butcher’s knife. I look much less forward to texting my sister and telling her she was right about Chef Louis, because I mocked her mercilessly in our youth and I’m afraid I will have to make up for it somehow. Thanks for NOTHING, Uncle Jesse.

Advertisement

The Little Mermaid Live! airs on ABC on November 5.

Night blogger, author of GOOD THINGS HAPPEN TO PEOPLE YOU HATE.

Share This Story

Get our newsletter

DISCUSSION

universerunner
A Lantern of Hope

Have merci.”