Jennifer Lopez and Maluma Want You to Know They Are 2 Sexy People Doing Sexy, Sexy Things

Y/NY/N is a guide to the week’s music releases based on our highly scientific, non-subjective Yes/No rating system.

I would also give up all my coins to fuck Maluma: Jennifer Lopez & Maluma, “Pa Ti + Lonely” - This two-for-one video tells the story of two incredibly sexy people having sexy sex, but one of them is a criminal and the other is an undercover FBI agent. It is less a music video and more an amalgamation of popular films like Wolf of Wall Street, Chicago, and Sabrina. While the videos are a pleasure to watch because of the aforementioned levels of sexiness, both songs Pa Ti and Lonely are relatively average—althoughLonely” which features less of Lopez’s attempts to sing, is the better track of the two. - Shannon Melero

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Actually, yeah: HTIEKAL (Lakeith Stanfield), “Island Man” - I didn’t know Lakeith Stanfield composed or recorded music prior to Monday morning, and now I want a full-length of the stuff. Under the moniker, “HTIEKAL,” his first name spelled backward, Stanfield composes mini film soundtracks, chopping up ambient fuzz with atonal, industrial noise and discordant recordings captured from mainstream news networks. “Island Man” is disorienting, and it’s meant to be, a reflection of our current reality. Also, Stanfield doesn’t rap until nine minutes in, and when he does, he cries—dressed like a cowboy, prepared to end his life or at least light American currency on fire. It’s devastating, and far better than expected. —Maria Sherman

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Nah, but it’s not M.I.A’s fault: Travis Scott feat. Young Thug and M.I.A., “FRANCHISE” - Look, it’s no “Sicko Mode,” but this song is... fine. Frankly, it’s a somewhat forgettable Travis Scott joint with a decadent music video to match. Its biggest flaw is that it’s a bit dull, but the beat saves it. But this track got M.I.A. trending on Twitter early Friday morning because people were clowning her verses. Was her contribution anything to call home about? No. But it didn’t bring the song down at all. If anything, M.I.A. chirping about “ackee” and “saltfish” on the track at least broke some of the monotony. Those critiques just scream sexism, honestly. She comprised 10 percent of a mediocre song and got all the flack? Keep it. —Ashley Reese


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Y: Gladie, “thank you card” - Gladie, a recently formed indiepop-punk band fronted by Philadelphia great Augusta Koch of Cayetana fame, is a new favorite—rounded out by Modern Baseball bassist Ian Farmer and The Spirit of the Beehive drummer Pat Conaboy. “thank you card” might be my favorite Gladie song to date, an animated, emphatic track that acts as damnation of someone whose lost direction as soon as they’ve found some monetary success—or maybe they never had it at all. “I just don’t trust anyone / to leverage power then call me family,” Koch sings, a grounding reminder for everyone. —MS


I’m no immune: Everglow, “LA DI DA,” - K-pop girl group Everglow’s latest, “LA DI DA,” is electrifying ‘80s pop, montage-in-a-coming-of-age-movie music, filtered through the energizing dance of an artist like Cascade. It got me off my ass when nothing seems to, and for that reason, I’m sold. There’s a distinct echo of Eiffel 65's “Blue (Da Ba Dee),” throughout as well, and if that’s not enough to convince you to press play, nothing will. —MS

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YES: World of Pleasure, “World of Pleasure” - It’s fall now, my favorite season and the season I most associate with pummeling, metallic D-beat written and recorded by vegan straightedge punks who’ve had enough, thank you very much. World of Pleasure’s debut EP, World of Pleasure, scratches that itch. “Dig up your demons to cut their throats,” Mortality Rate’s Jess Nyx laments with a piercing scream perfectly mirroring the one in my mind on her new band’s title track, “Bury them again just to shut them out.” Yes ma’am. —MS

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Yes (in a mechanized voice): Oneohtrix Point Never, “Long Road Home” - This, one of three tracks from the “Drive Time Suite” included on Oneohtrix Point Never’s upcoming Magic Oneohtrix Point Never album, is cinematic beyond the scores he’s made for Safdie Brothers’ movies Good Time and Uncut Gems. String-laden drama, sad robot voices, a rather dramatic conclusion—another personal-seeming, alien track from one of the most exciting and idiosyncratic producer/singer/songwriters making music today. —Rich Juzwiak

Senior Writer, Jezebel. My debut book, LARGER THAN LIFE: A History of Boy Bands, is out now.

Staff writer, mint chocolate hater.

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DISCUSSION

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BurnerBonesDootDoot

J-Lo + “but one of them is a criminal and the other is an undercover FBI agent.” and not a single call-out to Out of Sight??