Some Chaotic Suggestions for the New Great British Bake Off Host

Illustration for article titled Some Chaotic Suggestions for the iNew Great British Bake Off/i Host
Image: Great British Bake Off

On Thursday The Great British Bake Off, my favorite television show to learn about bizarre British pastries (bring it on, “picnic basket pie”), announced that one of the show’s hosts Sandi Toksvig was leaving the show. If only it could have been Paul Hollywood!

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That said, there’s a big hole in the show where a new host should be. Variety reports that Channel 4 is now looking for a replacement for Toksvig. We at Jezebel would like to help speed up the process, so we’ve compiled a list of potential candidates:

  • Me, I’m absolutely ruthless and can’t bake for my life
  • Mel and Sue, because I miss them
  • Peppa Pig, which would require sausage rolls to be banished from the competition
  • Meghan Markle, because I mean seriously what’s she even doing these days?
  • Hayley from Love Island, who didn’t know what Brexit was
  • One of the Gallagher brothers, I’m frankly too exhausted to choose between them
  • Millie Bobby Brown, because she scares me, and just admit it: she scares you too

I hope this helps, Channel 4! Who would you like to see politely critique dainty cakes?

Pop Culture Reporter, Jezebel

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DISCUSSION

PaintedTrollop
PaintedTrollop

They should get rid of Noel. I’m surprised a contestant hasn’t told him to fuck off - he’s always in the way. And he’s not funny.