The Best Part of Patti LaBelle's Cooking Show Is Watching Her Shit-Talk Her Guests Behind Their Backs

Food is not the only thing that gets roasted in Patti LaBelle’s kitchen. The sweet potato pie guru/owner of one of the best voices in the universe/consummate diva, who’s been known to scream at children and fans alike, debuted her new cooking series over the weekend. Patti LaBelle’s Place lived up to the promise of the similar specials she shot for the Cooking Channel last year.


The show finds a revolving number of famous and somewhat famous people dropping by LaBelle’s Philadelphia home to watch and occasionally assist her as she makes delicious-looking food. And then, in canned interviews, she talks about them behind their backs. 50 Cent’s corn-cutting messiness was critiqued, as was his soft hand for mashing potatoes. And Miss Patti certainly did not like the way Naturi Naughton cut that asparagus. She did not like it one bit! Highlights of her feedback (which contrasts hilariously with the patience she attempts to exude when her guests are in the room) are above.

On a good day, Patti Labelle explains, she is better—better than 50 Cent, better than any other of her guests, better than everyone else in the world. Watch her and become painfully aware of your mortality.

Some Pig. Terrific. Radiant. Humble.


Masshole James, Unstable Genius

My gay heart is excited imagining a new show featuring Patti Labelle and Mariah Carey. The problem is, it would last only for one short episode as there would be no survivors.