Some people wait a lifetime for a moment like this.

I am not a popaholic. While Dr. Pimple Popper often makes me laugh for the sheer audacity of what its producers have allowed on television, I do not generally find it satisfying in the brain-massaging way that some people do when they watch discharge pouring out of skin. When it is satisfying, it is usually in retrospect, as an endurance test I just conquered. That said, this...

...was satisfying. A perfect pop. A lipoma that was once inside the shoulder of a 43-year-old total dad, which just hopped out and ceased being part of him. How special, how rare, how nice it was not to have to watch Dr. PP tugging and ripping and twisting and tearing for once. It’s like the lipoma just got it and did exactly what it was told.

That said, when Luis did have this lipoma in him...

...it was kinda hot? Gave him some mass? Was part of a balanced pneumatic diet? He felt like Dr. Pimple Popper’s procedure was a good riddance, but I was left feeling a sense of loss.

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Also, the removal of several moles that were “spongey, flexible, and rubbery” on the face of 31-year-old Memphis resident Brittney created a reveal that was actually moving?

It’s so weird when Dr. Pimple Popper has you feeling emotions.

This week’s food analogies list is long and extensive—it marks the debut of a lipoma being referred to as looking like pizza dough, and extended (punishingly repetitive, really) discussion on how pus resembles cheesy grits.

I would also like to submit for your listening pleasure, two random clips I pulled from this ridiculous show—one of Dr. Lee referring to pus as “cute” and another, from an upcoming TLC show about foot doctors whose careers seem as, uh, lively as Dr. PP’s, of a doctor saying, “I’ve even taken things off people’s feet that look like ball sacs.”

Sounds like fun!

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